Wishful Thinking: A Bot for Everything

It’s April Fools’ Day, and in the spirit of fun, here are some bots that we wish were available to us.

Let’s meet them:

• The Where Are My Keys, Glasses, TV Remote, etc. Bot: This eminently useful bot eliminates the struggle of trying to find the everyday items we all frequently misplace. Using super advanced AI lost-item detection technology, this bot will zero in on whatever you can’t find and automatically alert you to its location (probably under the sofa cushions).

• In an effort to combat the massive amount of energy wasted each year by open refrigerator doors, the Refrigerator Contents Bot will automatically send a notification to you to let you know everything that’s in the fridge. This eliminates the need to stand there for hours surveying the contents while deciding what you want to eat.

• Excuse Generation Bot: Whether at home or at work, we can all use a little help sometimes when we need an excuse for why we can’t do something. Using the latest in advanced generative AI, the excuse bot will expertly craft the most plausible excuse in real time. You’ll never have to worry again about missing a deadline or showing up to a meeting late. We even have a kids’ version providing excuses far better than “my dog ate my homework.”

• And, after great demand and years of painstaking research, we are delighted to announce the Personal Barista Bot. This bot is specially designed to improve the daily caffeine intake and delivery that is essential in the modern workplace. With the most advanced AI to-date, this bot not only knows your standard order, but we also employ automated drone technology to deliver your brew WHEREVER you like it.

Happy April Fools’ Day!

Check out the bots we actually do have!